Today is Tuesday, September 29th, 2009. I have exactly 66 days before I will spend my last day as a Howard University student. Its been hell.
It is cold here in Maryland. It was 57 degrees when I stepped out of my house this morning and according to the weather center it is now 61. I've never been a fan of cold weather. I got to get the hell out of here.
Anyway, I started my 7th rotation today and it didn't start without drama as usual. One of the requirements regarding rotations is to contact each location at least 2 weeks in advance of our upcoming arrival. I feel like thats too long of a gap so I usually contact mines a week in advance. Last Monday, like clockwork, I call Holy Cross Hospital to inform them that I will be joining them on the 28th of September. I get an answering service and leave a message asking to have my call returned. In addition to that call, I emailed my preceptor saying that I am coming, asking for driving directions, parking instructions and so forth. By the end of that day I have no answer on either end, not through the phone or email. I was still a student on a critical care rotation at Inova Farifax Hospital so Tuesday, and Wednesday I let go by due to being busy as hell. I gave Holy Cross another call on Thursday, and Friday. No answer. I even informed the student coordinator at Howard of my delima but got no sympathy from him.
Monday rolls around and I decide to just take an extra day to myself. I've been pretty stressed and needed the extra rest just to keep it together. Around 1PM on Monday I give Holy Cross another call and magically someone answers the call. I've been calling this same number for a week with no return. I try to tell the voice on the other end how I've been trying to contact them but they hurridely ask what do I need. I explain that I need driving directions and any other helpful instruction, they tell me to check the website and show up on Tuesday at 9am. I say ok and without even a goodbye they hang up. (If you can imagine Madea looking at the phone going I know this bitch didn't just hang up on me, that would be the look and attitude that showed on my face at that moment.)
I showed up Tuesday around 9:20. (You know I can't be on time.) I got no greeting. The first thing said to me is, "Are you the student?" I say "Yes". They say, "Why didn't you show up yesterday?" I say because I called on last Monday to let you all know I was coming and sent an email saying the same and got no return call. I called on Thursday and Friday and still didn't get a call back. I explained that I didn't feel like I should just show up without speaking to someone first. She says, "Well, you gotta take that up with Lola." The only thing that went through my mind is can I at least get a hello? So, I am very intriged of who this LOLA person is.
So the bitch comes out of her office, some African bitch. I don't know why those Africans think they are so much better than those of us who were born and raised here. First of all, we don't have to AMERICANIZE our names. This ho's name is Kike S. Gbadamosi. Where the fuck did Lola come from? I hope that shit is not a nick name. Ugly bitch. So, she starts the conversation off just as rudely as the bitch before her asking why didn't I show up yesterday. I give her the same spill about emails and phone calls because that is what happened. She tells me that is unacceptable and that other students showed up. I ask if she got any of my phone messages. This is were the bitch goes off saying it is my responsibilty to show up on time and if I don't like it then I should leave and contact my school. She pushed the wrong fucking button and I said that is exactly what I will do. She says why don't you do that now. I see then that this bitch is trying to put me out. O hell naw! I inform her that I will be starting and finishing this rotation but will inform the school. She starts to explain the requirements and I completely ignore her taking my time to concentrate on not beating this bitch's ass.
I go back out to her rude secretary who prints some forms for me to complete, tells me to go to the break room and she will be back to get me in 20 minutes. That 20 minutes turns into 2 hours. I complain to all who enter the breakroom. I've never been someone to hold my peace. If it is wrong I will say something. Some pharmacist that was hired three weeks ago takes pity on me and goes out to get the ball rolling. I finally get an ID and then go to lunch. I come back and am ignored for another half hour. The secretary ho ask if I need something. I ask if there are any plans for me today or do I get to meet my actual preceptor? I had had enough. I get instructions to where my preceptor is and I am out of there.
My preceptor is actually a sweetheart. She's ugly, but a sweetheart.A great candidate for a fag hag. She is Howard Grad and started out by asking me to talk about myself. I can go on and on about that! I explain which rotations I've had. I usually lie about that but she made me feel so comfortable I explained which I had, which I liked and disliked and why. I told her about my day. She told me to brush that off my shoulder because God has bigger plans for me. She shows me around, gives me a little project and says she will see me in the morning at 7:30. I call the school to tell them about my day but again they show no concern. I am going to file a grievance. They don't know who they fucking with yet?
In regards to my preceptor, for her, I just might show up on time. Those other two bitches, they better watch their backs!
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
A mess!
Hello all. I have been one busy bitch. It has been one month and 8 days since my last post here and I have missed you so!!!!
Once again, I am having relationship problems. I think T and I are over. We haven't spoken in five days now. I guess now I am just waiting on him to come pick up his shit. Lets see if I can give you all a quick rundown of what happened.
I got sick and my mom came to take care of her baby. More on her later. T decided he would leave. I wanted him to stay and meet her, since he has basically been living here why leave now? But he told me out of respect for her he would leave and give her and me time to reconnect. I truly didn't want him to leave but he did. Mama Diamond said that my mother coming to visit was a blessing from above. She never liked him, said he was just using me. I've always been the kind of person who has to tire of situations instead of taking the advice of others, especially when the person giving out the advice is alone they damn self. No one has to like whats going on in my house but they must respect my decisions especially if they are not paying a damn bill up in here. After he left I went through two weeks of hell. It wasn't due to my mom being here, I was just so busy. I juggled work, school, and home and personal business. I thought I was going to have a nervous breakdown. I came home one day and my mom had packed T's clothes into a trash bag. I thought that was funny. He didn't of course. He looked so pitiful when I gave him that bag.
The week before my mom came I won a drag show and was booked to perform the following Monday. It was hell trying to buy things for the show and hide them from my mom. Thank God for Mama Diamond who allowed me to use her home. More on me and Drag later.
My critical care rotation kicked my ass too. I was in charge of the medications of patients in the intensive care unit, the sickest of the sick. Drunks, car accidents, motorcycle accidents, brain injuries, nursing home dumps, they all were there. My brain was truly picked but I did not loose one patient. Today was the last day of that rotation and I am truly thankful for that. That is a load off me. I know that I will never be a critical care pharmacist. Too much pressure and not enough time to think. Everything is stat! O hell naw!
CVS was hell as usual. They are sending out offer letters in about a week. It looks like I might have to take that offer for a little while. I really don't want too.
After I worked at CVS, T called me and asked me to come to Virginia to spend some time with him. Since my mother is here visiting I didn't think it was right to ask me to come to Virginia to see him. It wasn't like she was going to be here forever. I can see him anytime after she leaves. It was already Saturday evening after 6 and all I wanted to do was go home and lay my old tired ass down for sleep. So I told him I didn't feel like coming to see him. I was just too tired. I've never been one to beat around the bush with an opinion. I'm too old for that shit anyway. Then he throws this whole I'm hungry type of shit in the conversation. Even though I was tired as shit my brain kicked in. I said to myself, he only wants me to come out there so I can take him to get something to eat. So any thought on changing my mind went totally out of my car window. Then, I found out he had been off all day. I asked, "Why didn't you go out to get you something. There are plenty of restaurants in your area?" He got angry saying, "When have you ever known me to leave the house on my day off?" I said, "If you were hungry you would have gone to get you something instead of waiting on me." He got pissed which made me mad. I cut the conversation short. I was already under too much stress and don't need his shit too.
Since 2001 I've lived by a different motto. My favorite singer put out a song called "No More Drama." She performed that song on the Grammy's that year and it totally blew me away! I have lived by that motto every since. I can't do drama, conflicts, arguments, etc. So that is why I cut the conversation short. I will hangup on a bitch with the quickness. I ended up going to a barbecue my friends were giving and then took my ass home to my mama. The next night I get an angry drunken call asking if our relationship is over. I said it was on thin ice. He wanted an answer. He wanted to argue. I couldn't say what I truly wanted to say because my mom was here. He got me angry again and I cut it short again.
I do love him but I can't support him. Yes, relationships are suppose to be 50/50 but I am finding my self in an 80/20 situation with me providing housing, food, travel, laundry, etc. This is unfair to me. On my left arm, I have tattooed the Chinese symbols for love and happiness. I figured that if I tattooed that on my arm I'd have it forever. But will I ever have this in a physical form?
Once again, I am having relationship problems. I think T and I are over. We haven't spoken in five days now. I guess now I am just waiting on him to come pick up his shit. Lets see if I can give you all a quick rundown of what happened.
I got sick and my mom came to take care of her baby. More on her later. T decided he would leave. I wanted him to stay and meet her, since he has basically been living here why leave now? But he told me out of respect for her he would leave and give her and me time to reconnect. I truly didn't want him to leave but he did. Mama Diamond said that my mother coming to visit was a blessing from above. She never liked him, said he was just using me. I've always been the kind of person who has to tire of situations instead of taking the advice of others, especially when the person giving out the advice is alone they damn self. No one has to like whats going on in my house but they must respect my decisions especially if they are not paying a damn bill up in here. After he left I went through two weeks of hell. It wasn't due to my mom being here, I was just so busy. I juggled work, school, and home and personal business. I thought I was going to have a nervous breakdown. I came home one day and my mom had packed T's clothes into a trash bag. I thought that was funny. He didn't of course. He looked so pitiful when I gave him that bag.
The week before my mom came I won a drag show and was booked to perform the following Monday. It was hell trying to buy things for the show and hide them from my mom. Thank God for Mama Diamond who allowed me to use her home. More on me and Drag later.
My critical care rotation kicked my ass too. I was in charge of the medications of patients in the intensive care unit, the sickest of the sick. Drunks, car accidents, motorcycle accidents, brain injuries, nursing home dumps, they all were there. My brain was truly picked but I did not loose one patient. Today was the last day of that rotation and I am truly thankful for that. That is a load off me. I know that I will never be a critical care pharmacist. Too much pressure and not enough time to think. Everything is stat! O hell naw!
CVS was hell as usual. They are sending out offer letters in about a week. It looks like I might have to take that offer for a little while. I really don't want too.
After I worked at CVS, T called me and asked me to come to Virginia to spend some time with him. Since my mother is here visiting I didn't think it was right to ask me to come to Virginia to see him. It wasn't like she was going to be here forever. I can see him anytime after she leaves. It was already Saturday evening after 6 and all I wanted to do was go home and lay my old tired ass down for sleep. So I told him I didn't feel like coming to see him. I was just too tired. I've never been one to beat around the bush with an opinion. I'm too old for that shit anyway. Then he throws this whole I'm hungry type of shit in the conversation. Even though I was tired as shit my brain kicked in. I said to myself, he only wants me to come out there so I can take him to get something to eat. So any thought on changing my mind went totally out of my car window. Then, I found out he had been off all day. I asked, "Why didn't you go out to get you something. There are plenty of restaurants in your area?" He got angry saying, "When have you ever known me to leave the house on my day off?" I said, "If you were hungry you would have gone to get you something instead of waiting on me." He got pissed which made me mad. I cut the conversation short. I was already under too much stress and don't need his shit too.
Since 2001 I've lived by a different motto. My favorite singer put out a song called "No More Drama." She performed that song on the Grammy's that year and it totally blew me away! I have lived by that motto every since. I can't do drama, conflicts, arguments, etc. So that is why I cut the conversation short. I will hangup on a bitch with the quickness. I ended up going to a barbecue my friends were giving and then took my ass home to my mama. The next night I get an angry drunken call asking if our relationship is over. I said it was on thin ice. He wanted an answer. He wanted to argue. I couldn't say what I truly wanted to say because my mom was here. He got me angry again and I cut it short again.
I do love him but I can't support him. Yes, relationships are suppose to be 50/50 but I am finding my self in an 80/20 situation with me providing housing, food, travel, laundry, etc. This is unfair to me. On my left arm, I have tattooed the Chinese symbols for love and happiness. I figured that if I tattooed that on my arm I'd have it forever. But will I ever have this in a physical form?
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